Responsibility -- or the absence thereof...

Recent events call for this post..

I'm responsible for what danae does, says, etc.. So when she does something that reflects poorly on Me -- she takes it to heart.. Very rarely (can't even think of a time) when I had to call her out on it -- because she's very aware of the things she does and says..

That's why I'm a little amazed at the audacity of some "owners" who clearly don't care how their property reflects on them.. I won't get into names, it's someone we've never met -- but suffice to say that if this was our situation -- there would be no discussion and it would've been dealt with swiftly..

If this owner condones their property's actions -- then it really reflects on their character.. My guess is that they don't know what their property has done -- and if they are aware .... then their character takes an even greater hit..

Responsibility isn't a dirty word folks.. It falls inline with honor and respect..

The Drama of FetLife: an addendum

Early this morning an apology was extended to the FetLife community.. This was a significant step in the right direction.. In addition to publicly apologizing to those who may have been banned without warning or at least by way of the TOS, he outlined a plan to ensure the integrity of the group in light of certain events over the last 48-72 hours.. John spells out the responsibility he has to himself and to the community and I respect those words..

It's an opportunity..

Yes, wounds have been inflicted..
Yes, feelings have been hurt..
Yes, trust has been compromised..
Yes, it was a very ugly situation..

But as a community, we have an opportunity to once again bring the community together as it should be: to embrace our differences in a respectable manner that we hope others do back to us in kind.. I just hope that for some of those who are getting a second chance are paying heed to the opportunity.. No, I'm not addressing every person who was banned in the 48 hour holy war, because it's apparent that not everyone was out of line..

No, I'm addressing those incredibly unfortunate few that won't give a damn about any opportunity and will likely continue their incessant brainless diatribe without malice, consideration or respect.. It's sad when one's only plight in life seems to follow a line of obfuscation and destruction.. I only hope they can go piss in someone else's sandbox for awhile or to go crawl back underneath the boulder they came from.. So while we can all hope and pray for the miscreants get it someday -- but they seem to have in their bloodstream clearly prevents them from rational behavior, so I'm not counting on it..

The Drama of FetLife

I must admit on the outside looking in ... it's pretty petty honestly..

Without going into the sordid details -- (which by the way I know of none except what little morsels that have been blown to the size of boulders throughout numerous threads, groups and blogs already) -- I'm amazed at how well we as a community can really screw things up quicker than anything..

I don't know the site owner, John.. I've read some of his stuff and honestly - I think his heart is in the right place.. That said, he's adding to several layers of pretty hefty bone-headed problems for the community .... but not without the lunatics who can't seem to keep their panties on at the first sight of a FIRE HYDRANT!!

Jesus people...

Why is it that we continually tout the basic principles of "personal responsibility" and yet we can't even tie our own shoelaces without causing an international calamity?!?!?!?

Personal responsibility STARTS WITH YOU.. Personal responsibility ENDS WITH YOU..

Period..

If you can't grasp even the most fundamental understanding of what personal responsibility means -- then you're absolutely not ready to join a collective of folks who do get the concept.. If you can't keep your panties from twisting up just because of the shift of the wind -- then you're definitely not ready to join a collective of folks who can hold it together.. If you can't exercise restraint, call for diplomacy, or keep a level head during the middle of this "apparent crisis of biblical proportions" then I can completely understand why you're so deeply troubled whenever your TV plays the Geico commercials and the computer generated lizard..

C'mon people..

Use your head..

John has a whole wheel barrel load that he has to rectify and to be held accountable for.. If he's going to create a community and then violate his own terms of use -- then that's not much of a community.. It reeks of poor judgment if not poor actions.. But he has at least started down the path of recovery -- and it's a step in a logical direction that should've happened in the very beginning.. It's not as though I'm cutting him any slack -- because honestly, if anyone is brave enough to start a community like he's done, then you should also have the foresight to know that there will be days like today..

It's the reasons why we had fire drills in elementary school.. To practice for the unthinkable..

Yet....

A calamitous experience like an all out "war" that's happening in the halls of FetLife right now is also precipitated by the inherent lack of basic respect that we should have for one another.. The scathing posts about John's decision - rightly or not - should be met with caution and embraced with the demeanor that speaks more volumes when words are carefully selected instead of spitefully lunged like a balestra move.. Instead of adding more vitriol to the issue -- seek to remedy through a positive exchange that upholds the honor and respect we should have towards one another..

And if you can't act like an adult.. If you can't elevate your vernacular to the level beyond a petulant schoolyard brawl .... then please exercise your right to leave the group.. If you don't like how John is running his version of the lifestyle community that it's entirely within your ability to take the nearest exit and leave the plane in an orderly and efficient manner..

For myself -- I haven't decided if I'm going to participate or if I should simply follow out the exit doors myself.. It speaks a lot of a person when they can't truthfully relay the facts of what happened and arbitrarily apply a standard that has no substance, no form and no structure whatsoever.. For what FetLife was going to be -- it's unfortunate that the growing pains caught up to John in a way that could splinter the lifestyle even more than it is today..

I don't want to waste my time with the drama -- and judging by the length of this post -- I think I've dedicated the amount of time I am willing to offer..

A meme from my friend illiebrat :)

01. Do you have a tattoo?
02. How old are you?
03. Are you single or taken?
04. Eat with your hands or utensils?
05. What were you doing last time you daydreamed?
06. Ever seen a corpse?
07. Bob Dylan or Johnny Cash?
08. How did we meet on LJ?
09. Whats your philosophy on life and death?
10. If you could do anything with me, and have no one know, what would it be?
11. Do you trust the police?
12. Do you like Country music?
13. What is your fondest memory of fandom?
14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?
15. Would you cheat?
16. What do you wear to sleep?
17. Have you ever peed in a pool?
18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to?
19. If I appeared on your doorstep, unexpected, what would we do together?
20. Which do you prefer - short or long hair?
21. Do you sing in the shower?
22. What's your favourite fruit?
23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be?
24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you?
25. What was your first impression of me?
26. Have you ever done drugs?
27. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?

The Voice of God...

I was sad to hear of the passing of long-time legend Don LaFontaine who most folks don't even know about.. He's most commonly heard, but never seen -- as Don was dubbed "the Voice of God" because of his booming tenor voice that creates drama in the trailers we have watched for all of those years.. His anonymity was what he loved the most..

That is ... before the Geico commercial ...

... that would forever immortalize the man behind the voice ...

Very few can come close to mimicking his style ... and from someone who loves to try to mimic the "voice of God" ... I will miss his booming voice..

Update and discussions in the wee hours of morning

Whirlwind doesn't accurately describe life for us lately ... it's a bit of an exaggerated understatement.. We have a very small reprieve before life absorbs us again..

On the way over to the big city though -- danae and I had to strike up a few interesting conversations in order to keep Me awake (early morning drives are a bitch..) As the early morning sun was just beginning to peek on the horizon, we found ourselves immersed in several lifestyle discussions covering a wide range of topics of strange poly situations to kidnappings to deep levels of ... I'm not sure what you would call it.. It's primal, it's an almost dehumanization to the point where you bring the slave to a level that de-evolultion.. Definite dark thought material..

I'll probably write more later -- for now I'm just wrapping My mind around things..